george carlin politicians transcript george carlin politicians transcript

Well, where do people think these politicians come from? If it's a really serious matter, they make a JUDGMENT: POLITICIAN: I HAVEN'T MADE A JUDGMENT ON THAT. You have owners. You have OWNERS! Do you? Ill let Carlin tell you what he thinks. We could see through the hypocracy and illogic of our parents and teachers, but because of our age and size we couldn't do anything about it. POLITICIAN:WHEN HE RESPONDS TO MY INITIATIVE, I WILL REVIEW HIS RESPONSE, TAKE A POSITION AND MAKE A RECOMMENDATION. So, I have solved this little political dilemma for myself in a very simple way. But I'm sure they will still remove this. He was a spiritual atheist as an adult. George Carlin: In football, the object is for the quarterback, otherwise known as the field general, to be on target with his aerial assault, riddling the defense by . 'Oh, I'm so exhausted from traveling all over Europe for the third time this year. (LAUGHS). Michael Cooney was a speechwriter for @, George Carlin: 'Politicians don't actually say things, they INDICATE them', National Press Club - 1999. http://www.ravendevelopers.com/blog/2013/0 Bernie Sanders: 'So the next time you hear me attacked as a socialist, remember this', Georgetown University - 2015, Jimmy Carter: 'The threat is nearly invisible in ordinary ways. Dog, Cat, Thinking. Let's all tell each other what we're doing every minute of the day. So, that I can continue my work in Government. D} 8 &L$` %pPyZnC*ss9Qm^-u~Y]5;D- p?Ds+A$%C"CXU@5M`mO=YK6l[f0xc5j D6C"NMUCDV#[7q&>O!WsDm~ |!=?H^wM $M:w085uk8OaP;,p|Jp@H0 O#NE\f&KXl1DHq0,>b4A !oPfcmxe5)l*1x,g FC[A9u71-tILKA n_B--jxQjB,=oINnh;> R# }bO 7?|`M S(5OdC0#K1EH-Llj[~y' c7ozi=w,PP&e~g$2! *@@Gh!'[G F.r *N-@LoX15XvGA4#Wb_"$,%%8@2% George Carlins daughter, @kelly_carlin, on her first radio show with guest Paul Provenza, talking about this routine. No contest. Carlin was brought up Irish Catholic but grew into an outspoken atheist. We dont have people like that in this country. Most are only interested in self pleasures and bad habits. Here Is What You Support, Stop The Steal! Fuck em! They're your followers. TOUGH DECISIONS like: POLITICIAN (PLANNING):HOW MUCH SOFT MONEY CAN I EXPECT TO COLLECT IN EXCHANGE FOR MY CORE VALUES? George Carlin does not need my platitudes, but I will still proffer them. And then there's the political posts. The Wealthy the REAL owners! Reading the text, it sounds like a reasonably serious essaywell, sort of. 183 0 obj Yeah, the public sucks! The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. Before his death in June 2008, comedian George Carlin spent 10 years working on a memoir, Last Words, with his longtime friend Tony Hendra. People post pictures of themselves and their lives, trying to create a narrative that they're happy, successful, and popular. they're always PROCEEDING or moving forward. Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! These people on social media, they're not your friends. However, he calls himself an apatheist (meaning that he's an atheist who doesn't care about the topic). So self-important. endobj Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Incidentally, another way of expressing this sentiment is to say we're sending our young men and women to places the average American can't find on the map. While breaking down these claims on political correctness, Carlin implements his own set of values. xref There's a whole world out there waiting for you, and it's much more interesting than anything you'll find on social media.". A person who routinely spends his days torturing the language complains; POLITICIAN:THEY TWISTED MY WORDS. Nobody cares. Hi speech lovers,With costs of hosting website and podcast, this labour of love has become a difficult financial proposition in recent times. Now you can just hide behind a screen and fire off your misspelled, grammatically incorrect rants to thousands of strangers. Im sure as soon as the election is over, your country will improve immediately. You're just trying to impress people you don't even know. endobj Its almost a poetic rap. trailer If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people and they get into office and screw everything up, well, you are responsible for what they have done. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. It presents itself as fairness, yet attempts to restrict and control people's language with strict codes and rigid rules. endobj But, he is wrong here. It's a psychologically satisfying number: the top ten; the ten most wanted; the ten best-dressed. George Carlin was known for his insightful and humorous observations on modern society, including his thoughts on social media. No contest. 0000004120 00000 n xWnF}WDh%&^6F%&T{84e[A0@-3wUr-*l:, XF{HT+T0?LL q8"y1yY0LV"vQ|8:GwPBr,&]Qt7oz5n So let me tell you something. Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window). Did you ever think about the arithmetic? Several reasons. The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( \n h t t p s : / / d i g i t a l c o m m o n s . 0000015335 00000 n <>/Metadata 181 0 R/Outlines 136 0 R/Pages 174 0 R/StructTreeRoot 145 0 R/Type/Catalog/ViewerPreferences<>>> And don't even get me started on the whole idea of 'friends' on social media. v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a 54 decision affirmed the government's power to regulate indecent material on the public airwaves. Power, Politics & American Sports [transcript] [VIDEO CLIP] Jesse Owens: To me, politics has no part to play on the field of strife of . He said: [There was] a lot of classroom freedomin fact there was so much freedom that by eighth grade, many of us had lost the faith. Required fields are marked *. endobj m o n t c l a i r . That's why we need people who can make the TOUGH DECISIONS. You voted them in. But a comedian has the ability to use their anger and intelligence to refocus and reconstruct their pain into entertainment. You got people posting pictures of their food, their pets, their vacations. Use section headers above different song parts like [Verse], [Chorus], etc. And by the way, it's the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. Difference. They should be based on the parents' performance. The game is rigged and nobody seems to notice. Two reasons. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[308.9844 674.625 540.0 693.375]/StructParent 1/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> It has to be the WHOLE THING. And then, maybe, put down your phone and go have an actual conversation with someone. And the worst part is that social media has become a platform for outrage and self-righteousness. As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you. When they're in trouble, their explanations usually begin simply with words like MISS-COMMUNICATION; QUESTION:WHAT DID YOU DO WRONG, SENATOR?POLITICIAN:WELL, IT WAS A MISS-COMMUNICATION. That's a big activity here in Washington! You and I are not in the big club. Theres a reason. Off-course no politician would admit to such a lowly station as working in Government. Theres a nice campaign slogan for somebody: the public sucks, fuck hope. Fuck hope!. Yes, all the words are quite impolite. Most of the images you will find here are available for license or purchase. I recall many years ago, when he was guest-hosting the Tonight show, George Carlin having a somewhat strained political conversation with the comedian Shelley Winters. Theyll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! [5], Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. In fact at this point he might even say: POLITICIAN:I'M WILLING TO TRUST IN THE FAIRNESS OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. This is the best we can do, folks. 25l`|xs[e>L;}_}S +Fn-RWErk^7=fa,|~'RsiYK@"4W/:iVDrZWV)^:i\9KnwmVYi5v b^mfYN.[ T*gvIc"f=di^fE)SGO I dont vote. endobj He was a frequent performer and guest host on The Tonight Show during the three-decade Johnny Carson era, and hosted the first episode of Saturday Night Live in 1975. Garbage out. They dont pass through a membrane from some other reality. He is mostly non-political except for his involvement with the environmental organization, Greenpeace. He and his "seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. "A transcript of George Carlin talking about Social Media" First Response: First Response Certainly! This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. It's like a sewer of hate and stupidity. Apparently no one has ever claimed that only a small portion of something (LAUGHS) was blown out of proportion. Carlin was known for his dark comedy and reflections on politics, religion, psychology, language and taboo subjects. Regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comedians of all time, he was dubbed "the dean of counterculture comedians". I say that where the military is concern the extent of a POLITICIANS insincerity can be measured by how far around the world our soldiers are stationed and whether or not any of them(POLITICIANS) can pronounce it? The only difference is, when I get finished masturbating, Im gunna have a little something to show for it, folks.. So I know that a little later on this year, youre going to have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much. Carlin was not unique in that he saw through the thick layers of societal propaganda and rhetoric that are the source of many of the worlds problemsand let it be known that, despite his liberal stance on most social issues, he would point out their hypocrisies as wellbut he was well-respected and well-spoken enough to have left an impression on American thinking and history. 'Look at me, I'm so happy and successful and loved!' Narrow, unenlightened self-interest doesn't impress me. They spend billions of dollars every year lobbying, lobbying, to get what they want. Apparently, his last ballot was cast in 1972for McGovern. Copyright 2017 iComedyTV.com. THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. This is what we have to offer. But really, they're just regurgitating whatever they heard on cable news or read on some clickbait website. You know, that thing that's supposed to make us more connected and informed, but really just turns us into a bunch of self-obsessed, attention-seeking, validation-craving zombies. _S@bZ&j{|pQGB0qw_rm+eUr!:J9d j9mLJRL Q3PUn\#MuRJ\ *B6B6x What a great idea. George Carlin. And that certain sign that things are closing in: POLITICIAN:WHATEVER HAPPENED TO INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY (LAUGHS). You know what they're interested in? Nobody cares what you had for breakfast, or what your cat did, or what your opinion is on the latest political scandal. And they're all looking for that instant gratification of likes and followers, like it's some kind of digital high-five. He was raised an Irish Catholic, even an alter boy, and attended a Catholic school until the age of 15, when he dropped out of school.[1]. [5] And another one: 193 0 obj <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[466.2109 650.625 540.0 669.375]/StructParent 2/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? Thats against their interests. Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! I'VE FAITH IN THE AMERICAN JUDICIAL SYSTEM. Everybody complains about politicians. [wptabtitle]Friends[/wptabtitle][wptabcontent][twitter-feed username=shoq mode=search id=323794037750513667][/wptabcontent] Carlin left a wealth of social, political, and religious commentaryand most of it was highly critical. Such as the PROCESS: POLITICIAN:WE HAVE TO MOVE THE PROCESS FORWARD SO WE CAN IMPLEMENT THE PROVISIONS OF THE INITIATIVE IN ORDER TO MEET THESE CHALLENGES. Follow the link for the full transcript, its worth it, but here are a few choice excerpts: When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. `XX /;VU}`M%VO #5Zfb-> And theyre elected by American citizens. His final HBO special, It's Bad for Ya, was filmed less than four months before his death. I'm getting tired of that shit. I mean, why do we need to see some idiot eating Tide pods or jumping off a roof into a pool? <>/MediaBox[0 0 612 792]/Parent 175 0 R/Resources<>/Font<>/ProcSet[/PDF/Text/ImageC]/XObject<>>>/Rotate 0/StructParents 0/Tabs/S/Type/Page>> THE FOOD IS GREAT BUT PUBLIC SERVICE IS TERRIBLE. m o n t c l a i r . Search. Famous Quotes by George Carlin about Politics. Here it is: Why are there ten? POLITICIAN:WERE ADDRESSING THE PROBLEM AND WE'LL SOON BE PROCEEDING. If you want to make a difference in the world, if you want to connect with people in a meaningful way, put down the phone, step away from the computer, and go have a real conversation with someone. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(digitalcommons@montclair.edu)/Rect[400.0562 72.3516 527.5898 82.8984]/StructParent 7/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> The fact that Americans will probably remain willfully ignorant of the big red, white and blue dick thats being jammed up their assholes everyday, because the owners of this country know the truth. 187 0 obj 183 21 They're not your friends. Sure, there's some good stuff on there, but it's mostly just people filming themselves doing stupid things and hoping to go viral. Well where do people think these politicians come from? Obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. 0000015151 00000 n I have my ideas. He spoke about his book "Brain Droppings" and answered questions submitted by the audience. Press J to jump to the feed. This is said with a straight face although it's obvious of course that the proposition is stated precisely backwards (LAUGHS). But it's all a facade. POLITICIAN:HE HASN'T RESPONDED TO MY INITIATIVE. It was during the waning of the Nixon years, where confidence in government was beginning its slide down to the Stygian depths where it rests today; the Vietnam War, and racial unrest, continued to rage on. People trying to make the world save for their Volvos. Sure, here's a sample transcript of George Carlin talking about social media in one of his stand-up routines: "Let's talk about social media for a minute. Carlin is funny as hell. George Carlin - Euphemisms I don't like words that hide the truth. For added emotional impact sons and daughters can always be substituted for men and women and so I think we can sum this up. Then you're just what they're looking for. Not affiliated with OpenAI. Ive read it dozens of times. Maybe something else sucks around here. (LAUGHS). So, the next time you're walking around looking at your phone, tweeting and Instagramming and Facebooking, just remember this: you're not living in the real world, you're living in the digital world. Likethe public. Everybody's going to save something now. This legendary rant is even better when read. Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web! [wptabtitle]@Shoq[/wptabtitle][wptabcontent][twitter-feed username=shoq mode=feed id=323150247956193281][/wptabcontent] George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 - June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and social critic. They're your 'likes'. So, I know that a little later on this year youre gunna have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much [Bill Clinton v. Bob Dole]. The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. (CLAPS, LAUGHS). But the POLITICIANS, god bless them or something like that, they're are at their most entertaining when they're are in trouble. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) Im sure as soon as the election is over your country will improve immediately. George Carlin on why he likes disasters and people under pressure, and why the planet is doin' just fine. Do you think its possible that one of these POLITICIANS whose judgment is so poor that he honestly thinks of himself as serving the Nation might occasionally be expected to indulge in little patriotism huh What do you think? But that would be much too direct! <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( \n h t t p s : / / d i g i t a l c o m m o n s . In 2017, Rolling Stone magazine ranked him second (behind Richard Pryor) on its list of the 50 best stand-up comics of all time. Now having somewhat successfully established my Press credentials and because you and I have at-least one thing in common which is that all of us deal with language all the time, I thought it might be nice today for me to come to you with some of my language complaints, certainly not to blame them on you, although off-course youre implicated. Now, in the interest of logicsomething religion has a really hard time withI'm going to skip around the list a little bit: THOU SHALT NOT STEAL. Cause Americans have a lot of trouble dealing with reality. Transcript. Everyone experiences pain, of course. "George Carlin" Scripts.com. Fuck em! Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin's routine about social media: "Social media. Full transcript of George Carlin's "Dumb Americans," excerpted from "Life is Worth Losing, his 13th live comedy stand-up special, performed at the Beacon Theatre in New York City for HBO. Yeah the public sucks. And we've only been engaged in heavy industry for a little over two hundred years. CHALLENGES! startxref The transcripts I could find always sucked. And the more noise there is, the harder it is to hear anything worth listening to. But just as pressure and heat transform coal into diamonds, it's that frustration, social pressure and the heat of anger that transforms us into comedians. His satirical comments and relentless attacking a damaged system that unfairly trounced on the rights of its . I'm tired of fucking Earth Day, I'm tired of these self-righteous environmentalists, these white, bourgeois liberals who think the only thing wrong with this country is there aren't enough bicycle paths. Carlin is usually spot on. It's a big club, and you ain't in it. I on the other hand, who did not vote, WHO DID NOT VOTE. Everybody complains about politicians. Then watch the video. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money.[6]. The table has tilted folks. Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. In fact, it might be the thing that's making you unhappy. And so, a long last after each has RESPONDED to the others INITIATIVES and each has REVIEWED the others RESPONSES and everyone has taken a POSITION made a JUDGMENT and offered a RECOMMENDATION. NOW they have to do something! And so, with all of this in mind, folks, I offer you my revised list of the Two Commandments: THOU SHALT KEEP THY RELIGION TO THYSELF! Two hundred years versus four and a half billion. Carlin, for 40-years, was one of the greatest comedians ever. POLITICIAN:I ADVISED HIM THAT I HAD MADE A JUDGMENT. You dont. You crowned us', by Toni Morrison - 1988, for Michael Gordon: '13 days ago my Dads big, beautiful, generous heart suddenly stopped beating', by Scott and Sarah Gordon - 2018, Tara Westover: 'Your avatar isn't real, it isn't terribly far from a lie', The Un-Instagrammable Self, Northeastern University - 2019, Tim Minchin: 'Being an artist requires massive reserves of self-belief', WAAPA - 2019, Atul Gawande: 'Curiosity and What Equality Really Means', UCLA Medical School - 2018, Abby Wambach: 'We are the wolves', Barnard College - 2018, Eric Idle: 'America is 300 million people all walking in the same direction, singing 'I Did It My Way'', Whitman College - 2013, Shirley Chisholm: ;America has gone to sleep', Greenfield High School - 1983, Joe Marler: 'Get back on the horse', Harlequins v Bath pre game interview - 2019, Ray Lewis : 'The greatest pain of my life is the reason I'm standing here today', 52 Cards -, Mel Jones: 'If she was Bradman on the field, she was definitely Keith Miller off the field', Betty Wilson's induction into Australian Cricket Hall of Fame - 2017, Jeff Thomson: 'Its all those people that help you as kids', Hall of Fame - 2016, Dan Angelucci: 'The Best (Best Man) Speech of all time', for Don and Katherine - 2019, Hallerman Sisters: 'Oh sister now we have to let you gooooo!' [3], Carlin was equally hard on politics as he was on religion. Maher is a liberal who has endorsed at least the last two Democratic presidential candidates. They own you. What? And let's not forget about YouTube. Everybodys at the mall, scratchin his ass, pickin his nose, takin his credit card out of his fanny pack and buyin a pair of sneakers with lights in them. But hey, I guess it's just part of my glamorous jet-setting lifestyle.'. Isnt it a bit ironic, though, that the audience is laughing at all this when, essentially, Carlin is saying to them, directly to their faces, that they are stupid? They'll get it all from you sooner or later 'cause they own this f**kin' place. And not that you can help it, I mean the problem is really with the people you cover. endobj Web. Some parents deserve respect. Mr. GEORGE CARLIN: Here's another slogan you run into all the time "God Bless America." Once again, respectfully I say to myself what the (beep) does that mean. They dont want well informed, well educated people capable of critical thinking. So my advice is this: put down your phone, go outside, and actually live your life. Besides, environmentalists don't give a shit about the planet. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. Not on some social media platform where everyone's shouting into the void.". Oh, I gotta share this with my friends, you know what you should do? But wheres the logic in that? Subreddit to discuss about ChatGPT. Our country is failing because the majority of the people are selfish. And American English is loaded with euphemisms. everybody complains about politicians. George Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. An INITIATIVE is an idea that isn't going anywhere! If you have selfish, ignorant citizensif you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre gunna get selfish, ignorant leaders. This is the best we can do folks. All rights reserved. These are the websites where people go to express themselves, right? Never mind the press conferences get the big knife out of the drawer. Enjoyed this speech? Been through all kinds of things worse than us. They're a digital petting zoo. In this blog post, we'll take a look at some of Carlin's most famous quotes on government. endobj They dont want people who are smart enough to sit around a kitchen table and think about how badly theyre getting fucked by a system that threw them overboard 30 fucking years ago. We've been here, what, a hundred thousand? You wanna know what a friend is? Whenever the issue of term limits comes up, I always tell people the only term limits I'm interested in would be to limit some of the terms used by politicians. Quick Guide. "Forget the politicians. He was also known for his outspoken views on government and politics. That somehow we're gonna put in jeopardy this beautiful little blue-green ball that's just a-floatin' around the sun? You enjoy yourselves; itll be a lot of fun. Every time. (But First, Answer Me This). 0 And we've all bought into it. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts, Use the actual ChatGPT bot (not GPT-3 models) for all your conversational needs, Try out the powerful GPT-3 bot (no jailbreaks required for this one), Generate unique and stunning images using our AI art bot, Chat with the BING Chat bot and see what it can come up with (new and improved! If you can afford a donation, it will help Speakola survive and prosper. [wptabtitle]Blog[/wptabtitle][wptabcontent][/wptabcontent] 186 0 obj To avoid redundancy in the comments section, we kindly ask /u/arkreder to respond to this comment with the prompt you used to generate the output in this post, so that others may also try it out. POLITICIAN:SERVING THE NATION. ', Illustrator of the Year, British Book Awards - 2018, Tina Fey: 'Only in comedy is an obedient white girl from the suburbs a diversity candidate', Kennedy Center Mark Twain Award - 2010, Sacha Baron Cohen: 'Just think what Goebbels might have done with Facebook', Anti Defamation League Leadership Award - 2019, Greta Thunberg: 'How dare you', UN Climate Action Summit - 2019, Charlie Munger: 'The Psychology of Human Misjudgment', Harvard University - 1995, Lawrence O'Donnell: 'The original sin of this country is that we invaders shot and murdered our way across the land killing every Native American that we could', The Last Word, 'Dakota' - 2016. 0000002803 00000 n )'B^E_2yKg&. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. If you have selfish ignorant citizens If you have selfish ignorant citizens, youre going to get selfish ignorant leaders. Nobody seems to care! Watching the video and reading the transcript are, interestingly, two different experiences. From his 1992 (first ever LIVE) HBO TV special "Jammin' in New York", performed in from of 6,500 people at Madison Square Gardens. I dont vote. [FINAL NOTE: If you want to dig deeper into Carlins brilliant mind vis--vis comments on politicians and the doublespeak they are prone to use, check out The Consultation Institutes George Carlin on the language of politics. I just wanna put this behind me and that's an expression we hear a lot these days in all walks of lives. % And nobody seems to notice. Funny, Humor, Beer. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. George has been quoted as calling this his favourite HBO special of them all due to its continuous flow-on nature and high standard of writing. People are so quick to judge and attack each other over the smallest things. All across this great land of ours, the greatest nation on earth, the greatest nation in the history of the World and in times of military crisis you can be sure that someone in a suit in this town will eventually plant himself in front of a camera and carry on a great deal about the most powerful nation on the face of the earth.